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February 23, 2005
More firsts, more on old news resurfaced
Today Warren admitted it: "I'm into pain," he said.
So I added that to the list of likes.
Today was the first day of Excercise Therapy class. Yet another one I'm really excited about... it's all about how to give homework to our clients ;-) We'll be learning more about "body reading", orthopedic testing, and of course which exercises help which issues.
Also the first day of Anatomy & Physiology 3. It's the same basic format as the previous A&P classes, with homework questions, coloring book assignments, and tests.
Today was pretty cool, though... Soyka read us an article on "the effects of massage", all about what different studies have shown, and we talked about it as we went through it.
We ended class watching an old National Geographic film from the 70s on "the body"... bad hair, mustaches, crazy music, and some really awesome x-ray movies, cameras in various body cavities and organs, and other amazing stuff.
After dinner was a new thing called Essence... the founder of Heartwood and his wife lead chants and songs in the Temple. I almost didn't go, and was really glad I did. It was quite the mix, and over 25 people showed up. The Temple has good acoustics, so that many people singing together was fantastic.
I'm scheduled for a session with Soyka tomorrow. Oh. my. god. I can hardly wait. Sometimes we just really need help, you know?
That reminds me: I had thought I had put the issue of the fourth quarter to bed, then I felt waffly on it when i got back.
The almost-most-recent update is that on Monday, I believe, I asked myself "So what if someone called offering to write a check... either to Heartwood for the fourth quarter, or to an ortho-bionomist for the 500 hour basic training?" and the answer was quick and decisive: See ya, Heartwood.
The most recent update is that tonight I was telling someone about it, and the answer wasn't so quick or decisive. And he thought I should make a decision without considering the money, and then try to make the money work.
Again, I could finish this quarter, and THEN still stay for the fourth quarter. I suppose I can wait to see how work on my core issue proceeds. The fact of the matter is: the core issue is nothing that can be dismissed by mere words of encouragement from someone else, and unless it is resolved, the last 9 months, all the time, the money, the stress, and the hardship on my relationship will not have accomplished the number one goal of coming here: enabling me to start a career and support myself with a decent income. And I will be right back where I was in Rochester, only with more debt.
This is not merely worrying about the future based on the past... this is based on feelings I have felt this week, feelings I recognize. I'm really hesitant to accept that anyone can relate to this unless they can describe their experiences with it in a way that sounds sufficiently similar to my own. A truth is: I don't believe very many people have honestly had this issue, not in the ways I have. I'm not saying I believe I'm alone in it, just that the guest list is pretty short.
But, I did battle with it all last quarter. I didn't just give up. Let's see how my session goes.
Posted by Josh A. at February 23, 2005 09:04 PM