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November 22, 2004
One day, it will be Monday and then
Today was not as bad as a Monday could have been.
I talked to Amy about how I have tended to experience bodywork class here.
She first met me, and spent most all of our interaction time, in Communication Skills class. I explained how this meant that she got to know me "in my element". I don't just swim in it, I do tricks in it. I play and jump about excitedly in it.
Modality classes are the opposite. They are on my edge. They often bring up strong emotions in me. I often feel a need for more attention in class, more help, more support. I sometimes feel like the worst student in the class. So I summed it up, saying, "This is hard for me."
She thanked me for bring it to her awareness, and class went amazingly smooth today. I felt more supported, the time went by quickly, and we covered arms and anterior legs.
Kinesiology was fun and went by fast. We looked at movers of the neck/head and spine/trunk. We'll have to know the major movers, their actions, and their origins and insertions... down pat. Flash cards will be essential, I think.
I feel behind already, really out of it with the muscular anatomy. I still don't have a feel in my body for, say, the splenius muscles, or the obliques (let alone cervicus versus capitus, or internal versus external). Hey, getting clear on hamstrings versus quads was a big deal for me. And I still don't think I have a trapezius. It's a really thin muscle and I just don't feel the dang thing. It's not like the sternocleidomastoid that just bulges out when we turn our head to one side.
We did this posture exercise, and Soyka came around to adjust my head & neck... she explained that at the point when I, internally and subjectively, feel alignment, my chin and head are still out, saying "You're a future kind of guy, come back to the present." Well, I walked around like that and it's amazing how a simple postural change can bring up such emotional discomfort. Big surprise, I'm not really comfortable in the present. Who is? Go read The Power of Now again.
Watching anatomy with Doc Ock freaks me out. Our entire head pivots around a very small vertebral protrusion called the odontoid process... and it's just not very big around. Any good bottom can tell you, it's girth that's important. So watching a dissection of a real live (dead) atlanto-axial joint just brings too strongly into my reality the fact that the only thing standing between us and a dislocated head is this leeeetle pinky finger looking excuse for a bone. Oh, and a network of insanely strong ligaments, fascia, and layer after layer of muscles. But who's counting.
Tonight was Supervised Practice.
It. Was. Awesome.
I walked into the Kiva to find hot massage music playing, candles, and dimmed lights.
One word: Erica.
To paraphrase Jana, "This was earth-mama-nurturing show-you-what-it's-all-about" tone setting and space holding. She had asked us to come in a full half hour early, and this was why. We had time to do some movement, come together in a circle, and listen to an important song she wanted us to hear.
Some of us find ourselves missing Erica and Kassy, not just because we like them, but because of the space they held for us. I have no doubt that Amy can do so amazingly well; I don't understand why she hasn't seemed to do so with us.
So even though I had difficulty remembering the way we were shown to work the arms, and felt really off with the treatment, and have pain in my mid-back... the energy was great, my client was so grateful, and Erica said my body mechanics looked great. (Yeah, I looked around to see who she was talking to.)
So according to Louise Hay, mid-back pain can represent guilt/not releasing the past. I'm just hoping this shift upwards means I've made good progress with the Kidney work I've been doing. I wonder if mid-back isn't related to the Lungs.
We got our TCM cups tonight. I bought four, two small and two large. I cannot wait to begin using them. I think I wrote about them when we did cupping in Shiatsu last quarter, but basically you create a vacuum in them and apply them to the skin. The suction keeps them on. Great for dispersing excess... helping colds and flus... and it feels really good :)
Posted by Josh A. at November 22, 2004 11:55 PM