From Behind the Redwood Curtain

Good one Josh, it's necessary in my opinion to be able to keep one's existing friends, even as one move away from them, while at the same time building new, more connected relationships.

This is what I've found on the journey that insight meditation has taken me. I love my old mates even more dearly, while they find it hard to comprehend my new ways.

But sangha, the new web of relationships, is so important to me now, it's a part of the foundation that supports me.

How do you know you arent being met in the middle. Perhaps people on the other side believe they are meeting you half way. Try and look at it this way. Perhaps your grandmother and others have seen themselves as meeting you half way and then some by their actions and support although she may not understand your choices. Life is a struggle at times and may feel like the world is not living up to your expectations. The best thing for me at those times is to realize that its only a day in the life. New days come and go and we do the best we can to get through them. People are here to meet you half way.

"People are here to meet me halfway."

That's a great affirmation.

I think part of the solution will be expressing my needs to folks more clearly, which I can now do after realizing a bunch of stuff that has yet to be journaled about

I highly recommend NaturalHealers.com for choosing any alternative medicine school, especially massage schools.

I can't recommend them, joe. I tried to use their site during my selection process and gave up on it pretty quickly.

First, I don't find their listings extensive enough--in California they leave out Esalen and Heartwood? Are they trying to help us make an informed decision from amongst all our choices, or just among the choices that fit their profit model?

Second, I found it way too difficult to get to the individual school websites and not easy to do anything I really needed. The directory might be nice if it added any more value than providing a list of schools--like advanced search capabilities, a comparison tool--instead of merely self-serving "features" that let them track how many hits each school is getting... but it doesn't. Are they really providing a useful service, or just trying to make some easy money?

Frankly, Josh, this is NOT a "meet half-way"thing, if you mean compromise a little here and there. You must figure out what you need to sustain yourself psychologically, mentally, spirtually, physically, in all ways. Decide on the minimum, and NEVER, NEVER sacrifice the minimum. You may compromise the ideal or the maximum or the extra, but never the minimum.

Find the minimum and DO NOT COMPROMISE the minimum. Seek out and find friends and loved ones who will support the minimum. More importantly, seek out and befriend people who are not endlessly needy themselves or emotionally immature. You need to surround yourself with people who are well, centered, clear, emotionally mature. You will be giving to your clients who will take whatever you can give. They will pay for that and they are entitled to whatever you can give. You do not need to spend your precious psychic energies taking care of your friends.

The keys are (1) emotional maturity and (2) lack of neediness. Find these people; they will sustain you. There are a few around; look for them.